


Echoes of Faith

by me_llamo_nic



Category: BtVS - Fandom, Dollhouse, Jossverse
Genre: Crossover, Crossover Pairing, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-07
Updated: 2010-08-07
Packaged: 2017-10-10 23:49:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 16,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/105794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/me_llamo_nic/pseuds/me_llamo_nic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Buffy visits the L.A. Dollhouse to request the services of an active.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Parameters of Engagement

**Fandom**: BtVS/Dollhouse  
**Title**: Echoes of Faith  
**Chapter 1**: Parameters of Engagement  
**Characters/Pairing**: Buffy/“Faith”, Echo  
**Rating**: PG so far…more later  
**Warnings**: None for this chapter.  
**Summary**: Just when Adelle thinks she’s heard everything…  
**A/N**: My first crossover fic and my first Dollhouse fic. The rest is familiar territory.  
**A/N2**: Back to unbeta’d for this one (seeing as I’ve only got the one and I don’t want to overwork her). Hopefully you readerly types can get past my atrocious habits and enjoy the fic anyway.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

                “Eggs and flour,” Adelle mused sardonically to her empty office, having shut the double doors behind the most recent client, “just when I think I’ve heard everything.”

                She crossed to her liquor table and surveyed the bottles there. Of course the scotch was nearly empty. With a sigh, she poured the last of it: not even enough to fill a shot glass. She savored the swallow and set the glass down with an emphatic ‘thunk’ before returning to her desk.

                “Judith,” she spoke commandingly as she pressed down the call button on her intercom, “have another bottle of scotch sent from the kitchens and don’t disturb me until my three o’clock gets here.”

                “You’re three o’clock _is_ here, Miss DeWitt,” Judith’s timid voice replied through the intercom.

                “What?” Adelle’s finger left the call button as she glanced up at her clock.

                3:13

                “Damn,” she muttered angrily. She took a deep breath and pressed the button again. “Very well, send her in,” she ordered in level, clipped tones. “And I want that scotch when we’re done.”

                “Very well, ma’am.”

                Adelle turned to face the doors as they opened and a petite blonde woman stepped in. She was slightly shorter than Adelle, with her hair tied back and a weary look that gave a certain gravity to her young face. She dressed fashionably, though her brown coat was starting to fray at the sleeves and looked like it had been torn in one place: not what one typically expected from the visitors that walked through the doors of 23 Flower. Of course, Adelle doubted that this woman was here for anything that could be classed as typical. Rumors of this woman and her band of warriors were common in Los Angeles, especially to a woman as well-connected as Adelle Dewitt.

                “Miss Summers,” Adelle greeted her with bravado as she extended a hand, “it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

                “Likewise, I’m sure,” though Buffy Summers sounded skeptical as she and Adelle shook hands.

                “Do come and have a seat,” said Adelle graciously, gesturing toward the sofa and coffee table. “Can I get you a drink? Tea or – something stronger?”

                “No thanks,” Buffy dismissed casually as she sat down. “Nothing personal, just – years of pent up paranoia.”

                “Yes, I’m sure that can happen in your line of work,” Adelle noted with a nod, seating herself in the chair on the opposite side of the table.

                “And what would you know about my line of work,” Buffy challenged with narrowed eyes.

                “You don’t go unnoticed, Miss Summers,” Adelle answered, meeting Buffy’s eyes boldly. “There are all sorts of colorful rumors about you and your army. Particularly here, what, with your exes cavorting about the place.”

                “Excuse me?”

                “I actually did business with one of them,” Adelle continued, unperturbed. “Tall fellow, black coat, furrowed brow.”

                “Angel came _here_?” asked Buffy in disbelief.

                “Oh, not as a client,” Adelle corrected the impression quickly. “No, he was running a law firm at the time. We had gotten into a spot of legal trouble regarding an incarcerated active.”

                “And you’re telling me this – why?” Buffy prompted.

                “To demonstrate how blurred the lines are,” Adelle explained. “The world is not as comfortably black and white as you and yours might prefer it to be. So if you’re here as part of some misguided attempt to bring us down or-”

                “What?” Buffy interrupted blankly, half-chuckling as she spoke. “Miss DeWitt – that’s not why I’m here at all.”

                “It’s not?” Adelle seemed to be momentarily put off her stride.

                “No,” Buffy assured her calmly. “I’m here,” she reached into her coat pocket as she spoke, “to ask about,” she extracted two photographs, “her.” Pushing one photograph across the table, she waited quietly for a moment as Adelle examined it. “She’s one of yours, right?” Buffy pressed. “An active?”

                “I’m afraid I still don’t understand-”

                “This,” Buffy pushed the second photograph forward, “is a – friend of mine.”

                Adelle’s eyes widened as she surveyed the second picture.

                “Ah,” she nodded to herself. “Well, that makes things a great deal more clear. However, I can assure you that Miss Farrell _elected_ to come here of her own free will and-”

                “Who?” Buffy cut her off again.

                “I’m sorry?”

                “What are you talking about?”

                “Are you not here for Caroline Farrell?” asked Adelle, confused once again.

                “Who’s Caroline Farrell?”

                “She is.” Adelle pointed impatiently at the second photograph.

                “Oh – no,” Buffy corrected. “These are two different girls, Miss DeWitt.”

                “I beg your pardon?”

                “This one,” she gestured to the first picture, “is your active and this one is named Faith.”

                “You’re sure you didn’t just meet her while she was on an engagement?” Adelle verified.

                “I’ve known her for years,” said Buffy flatly.

                “Well, that’s very interesting,” Adelle conceded. “A few things might have made more sense if Caroline were one of your girls, but no matter. I’m still not sure why you’re here.”

                “I want an active,” Buffy explained. “Her. For an engagement.”

                “Oh,” said Adelle shortly. “So you’re – actually here as a client then?”

                “Yep.”

                “You should know that our engagements come with a pretty steep price tag,” Adelle cautioned. “I wasn’t aware that your organization was particularly wealthy.”

                “We have access to money,” said Buffy simply. “And I’ve got – a lot – in a private account.”

                “I’ve known a lot of people who believed they were wealthy and walked through these doors only to discover that they were, in fact, very small fish and the pond was bigger than they had imagined.” She raised her eyebrows pointedly as she finished.

                “I can afford it,” Buffy repeated, fighting the urge to roll her eyes at the metaphor.

                “Well, that’s fine then,” Adelle announced, smiling genuinely for the first time since Buffy had entered the room. “May I ask what your intentions are?”

                “My intentions?” Buffy repeated.

                “For the engagement,” Adelle clarified.

                “The, uh, girl – Judith,” Buffy mumbled, gesturing vaguely toward the office doors, “she said I didn’t have to tell anyone the details.”

                “Well, of course not,” said Adelle quickly. “I was only being curious. If you prefer not to tell me that is entirely at your discretion. Our computers do calculate possible risks to our actives, however. The fee would increase if the engagement involved any dangerous activity.”

                “Oh – well, I don’t have anything dangerous planned,” said Buffy reassuringly.

                “You should know that, while our imprints do extend to muscle memory and would give her the skills, she wouldn’t have the strength of one of your – Slayers.” Buffy blinked once in reaction to Adelle’s use of the term.

                “If I needed Slayer strength, I’d get a Slayer,” said Buffy simply. “Your active won’t be in any danger.”

                “Very well, I suppose,” Adelle conceded. “Though I must admit I’m still quite curious,” she leaned forward as she spoke. “You command a very powerful army and yet somehow your needs have brought you here.” For Echo, no less, and that was a coincidence Adelle could not easily overlook. “Why do you need her specifically?” Adelle questioned. “Any of our actives could be programmed just as easily as her. So it’s not the skill set you need…”

                “I really wish you’d stop trying to guess this,” said Buffy pointedly.

                “You’ll forgive me if I’m suspicious, but it’s all a bit too simple,” Adelle countered. “You being here is more than enough cause for concern.”

                “I’ve told you, your active will be returned safely.”

                “Has your friend passed on?” Adelle inquired. “Is that why you need someone who looks like her?”

                “No, she’s fine,” Buffy insisted, “she just – look, it doesn’t matter, okay.”

                “Is it a decoy you’re after?” Adelle guessed again. “I heard about the one you had in Rome.”

                “This isn’t Slayer-related!” Buffy fumed, frustration finally hitting its peak. “This is just for me – something _I need_. I told you she’ll be safe, now you can either believe me or not.” She took a breath to calm herself. “So, can we do this?”

                “Well,” said Adelle thoughtfully, “we are the experts at giving people what they need.”

                “Good. We have a deal, right?”

                “Yes, very well,” said Adelle with a sigh. “Though if you fail to return our active safely, there will be consequences.”

                “As intriguing as it sounds,” Buffy began, “I’m really not interested in a war with the Dollhouse. You’re out of my jurisdiction.”

“Yes, fine,” said Adelle impatiently. “Come along,” she ordered as she stood. “You can enter the specific details into the confessional.”

                “Actually,” Buffy stood as well, reaching for an inside pocket of her coat as she did so, “I brought this.” From inside her coat she procured a hard drive, which she handed over to Adelle.

                “Is this what I think it is?” questioned Adelle, eyes widening again.

                “All the data from a brain scan,” said Buffy plainly.

                “How on earth did you know you would need this?”

                “Does it matter?”

                “I rather think it does,” said Adelle shortly.

                “Don’t worry about it.”

                “Am I to understand that you want the active who looks like your friend to be imprinted _as your friend_?”

                “Is that a problem?” Buffy challenged.

                “We can do it,” said Adelle dismissively. “Do you want a straight brain dump or will you be making alterations?”

                “A few things,” Buffy hedged.

                “Then we’ll still need the confessional.”

                “And what exactly is-”

                “The computer where you input the details of your engagement,” Adelle explained.

                “Okay then.”

                “May I ask,” Adelle interrupted as Buffy started off toward the double doors, “does your friend know you’re altering her personality?”

                “Does it matter?” Buffy repeated defensively.

                “So, how did you get her brain scan without her knowledge of it?”

                “Unconventionally,” Buffy snapped. “Now will you please drop this?”

                “I suppose I could,” Adelle allowed. “Though I’m fairly sure I understand it now.”

                “I wish you wouldn’t,” mumbled Buffy as they crossed to the doors.

                “Now, now,” Adelle persisted, “there’s no judging in the Dollhouse.”

                “Oh God,” Buffy groaned uncomfortably.


	2. What You Don't Know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Willow and Buffy talk. Buffy prepares for her meeting with "Faith".

**Fandom**: BtVS/Dollhouse**  
Title**: Echoes of Faith  
**Chapter 2**: What You Don’t Know  
**Characters/Pairing**: Buffy/“Faith”, Echo  
**Rating**: PG-13ish  
**Warnings**: None.  
**Summary**: Willow and Buffy talk. Buffy prepares for her meeting with “Faith”.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

**Boyd:** You really think it has anything to do with need?

**Dr. Saunders:** Sometimes, yes. Having a desire you're afraid or ashamed of expressing can be terribly debilitating. Look how many same-sex engagements we're called for, even today.

_-from Dollhouse S01E09: A Spy in the House of Love-_

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

                Buffy sat at a small table outside of a cozy little café. The afternoon sun was bright and the outdoor tables were shaded with large parasol umbrellas. A light breeze rustled down the promenade as busy people passed to and fro. A couple of the other tables hosted customers, but the café was not very crowded. Buffy anxiously awaited her guest’s arrival…

**\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**:::4 Days Earlier:::**

                “Buffy,” said Willow insistently, “can we talk about this?”

                The pair sat on opposite ends of a couch in the suite where Buffy was currently staying. A gentle rain drummed against the windows and the overcast sky left only the yellowish glow of a lamp to light the room. The Slayer shifted uncomfortably.

                “What do you mean?” Buffy questioned, trying her best to sound innocent.

                “You think I don’t know what this is for?” Willow waved the hard drive she was holding.

                “I was kind of hoping you wouldn’t know _exactly_ what it’s for,” said Buffy meekly.

                “You’re going to the Dollhouse,” Willow stated boldly. “You’re gonna have them imprint someone as Faith so you can,” she gestured aimlessly for a moment, “you know.”

                “Oh,” said Buffy, unsettled. “Well, you still made the wedge,” she accused.

                “I did,” said Willow calmly. “And I’ll give it to you if you want it, but as your friend – I’m asking you to think about this.”

                “You think I haven’t?”

                “I didn’t say that,” Willow defended flatly.

                “Because, what?” Buffy persisted hotly, “I couldn’t possibly arrive at a decision other than the one you think is right?”

                “There’s really no need to be so-”

                “I need this, Will,” Buffy stated firmly.

                “Why?” Willow countered levelly. “Why _this_ specifically?” She waved the drive again for emphasis.

                “I need this experience,” she answered, “I need to know…” she trailed off, struggling for the right words to describe it.

                “Okay,” said Willow, voice still unnervingly calm. “I understand wanting to experiment. And I still disagree, but I can even see how the Dollhouse could be helpful there. But you asked me to make a Faith wedge. And – the difficulty of techno-mystical hybrids aside – I think there’s something that should be addressed there, don’t you?”

                “What’s there to say?” Buffy mumbled with a shrug.

                “Buffy, if it’s Faith you want then you should just go and see her,” Willow reasoned.

                “Go and see her?” Buffy repeated incredulously. “And say what?”

                “Well, a lot of people start with ‘hi’, but you could always go another direction if you-”

                “Oh, sure, make jokes,” Buffy fumed.

                “All I’m saying is if you want Faith, you should go to Faith. And if you don’t then you shouldn’t just dump her personality into some brainwashed zombie,” Willow’s calm faltered slightly as she spoke. “You know what this is like, don’t you? This is just like the Buffybot.”

                “You don’t know the – never mind,” Buffy stopped her reaction in mid-sentence.

                “What?” asked Willow sharply.

                “I said never mind.”

                “Half of it?” Willow guessed. “What else is there?”

                “It really doesn’t matter,” said Buffy quickly.

                “Buffy,” Willow sounded seriously concerned now, “are you – you’re not taking Faith in there, right?”

                “What? God no,” Buffy dismissed immediately. “And why would I need a brain scan if I had her whole brain?”

                “Oh – yeah – right,” Willow realized. “But what is it then?”

                “You wouldn’t like it,” Buffy cautioned.

                “Tell me,” Willow insisted.

                “Okay,” Buffy sighed. She pulled a small drawer from the table next to the arm of the couch and passed Willow a photograph from inside it.

                “So – you’re stalking Faith?” asked Willow, mystified. “Working on a shrine, maybe?”

                “No, it’s – Willow, that’s not Faith.”

                “What?” Willow studied the photograph for a moment and her eyes widened. “Oh!”

                “Yeah,” said Buffy shortly, unsure of what could be added to the photograph’s testimony.

                “How did you find out?”

                “I saw her on a news report,” Buffy explained. “It was something out of Arizona, but she was long gone by the time I got there. There was a guy with her picture though – FBI, I think – I followed him back to L.A. I spent a lot of time looking and getting nothing until one day I saw her again – getting into a black van that went to 23 Flower.”

                “Is that where it’s at then?” Willow questioned.

                “Pretty sure,” Buffy confirmed.

                “Wow,” said Willow blankly, still staring at the photo. “I mean – she looks just like her. Which of course means this is _exactly_ like the Buffybot.”

                “Well, I…”

                “Do you remember how it made you feel when you found out Spike was doing that?”

                “Of course I do,” Buffy assured her.

                “Why would you want to put Faith through that?”

                “Well, her finding out isn’t exactly part of the master plan,” Buffy pointed out.

                “Buffy,” Willow began slowly, “what’s the real reason you’re afraid to go to Faith with this?”

                “Will you listen to yourself?” Buffy demanded. “How do you go up to someone and say, ‘oh, by the way, can we try some gay stuff sometime?’”

                “Most people wouldn’t open with that,” Willow replied. “It’s more of a build-up-to-it kind of thing. And I think you know that, so what’s the real issue here?”

                “There is no – _this_ is what I can have. You and I both know it would never work with Faith; this is something I can actually have.”

                “You think it wouldn’t work?” Willow inquired. “I mean, maybe you guys wouldn’t be my _first_ pick for a couple, but there’s definite chemistry between you two. Kennedy even thinks you guys have probably had some really good hate sex.” Willow let the sentence hang for a moment, wondering if Buffy would answer the claim.

                “We haven’t,” said Buffy flatly.

                “The point is: chemistry. You guys could probably make it work if you wanted to.”

                “No we couldn’t,” Buffy countered dryly. “Faith’s never really been long term-”

                “Neither is a doll-zombie,” Willow observed.

                “And look at my track record with relationships,” Buffy continued. “We’d just get hurt. And yeah, it would still be short term with a doll because I’d have to give her back when it’s over…but at least I know she wouldn’t hurt me.”

                “That’s what you’re afraid of?”

                “I’m afraid of everything,” Buffy admitted sadly.

                “You know that’s normal, right?” Willow reminded her. “I mean, everyone goes through that stuff in relationships. And you know better than anyone how much Faith has grown over the years.”

                “That doesn’t mean-”

                “Why’d you leave, anyway?”

                “What?” Buffy questioned.

                “I mean – why did you leave Cleveland?”

                Buffy looked down as she twisted her hands in her lap, hesitant to answer the question.

                “Buffy?” Willow prompted. “Did something happen that I don’t know about?”

                “No, not really,” said Buffy plainly. “She just – I mean, she was always so on-again, off-again with Robin. And I couldn’t keep putting myself through that – just wondering if one of those times she might turn around and realize I was there. I decided I couldn’t just spend the rest of my life hung up and waiting.”

                “And look how far you’ve come,” Willow noted.

                “This isn’t – I was so moving on,” Buffy defended. “When I saw that girl on TV I thought I must’ve been imagining things, but then I replayed it-”

                “Replayed it?”

                “Will, it’s the twenty-first century, no one watches live TV anymore,” said Buffy flatly.

                “Yeah, I know that,” said Willow, “but you DVR the news?”

                “Oh – no – I – they…” Buffy trailed off for a moment. “Okay, you can’t tell anyone about this,” she cautioned. “As of now your lips are Fort Knox.” Willow mimed locking her lips with a key. “They interrupted my soap.”

                “Buffy Summers, you shallow, vapid trollop,” said Willow slowly, grinning to herself as she spoke. “Which one?”

                “Days of Our Lives,” said the Slayer with a blush.

                “Oh,” Willow sighed happily, “I could eat Sami Brady with a spoon.”

                “Um, yeah,” Buffy mumbled supportively. “I’m – really more of an EJ gal, myself.”

                “And yet there’s Faith,” Willow noted.

                “All this time we could’ve been talking about Days-”

                “Nope,” Willow cautioned firmly. “Stop dodging the subject, missy.” She wagged a finger disapprovingly.

                “Yeah, there’s Faith,” said Buffy softly. “But it won’t happen, okay. So, can we please just drop it?”

                “What are you more afraid of?” Willow prompted.

                “Will you stop it?” Buffy insisted.

                “Buffy, there are clearly a lot of layers to this,” said Willow concernedly. “I’m just trying to help you figure out what you really need to be addressing here. Because this,” she waved the drive yet again, “isn’t it. And I don’t buy the Robin thing either.”

                “What?”

                “She’s been on-and-off with Robin since back when Sunnydale was still standing,” Willow pointed out, “so, what changed?”

                “I don’t know,” mumbled Buffy. “I guess maybe I – sort of felt like was cramping her style or something.”

                “Really?” asked Willow curiously.

                “I mean – Cleveland’s sort of her town,” Buffy explained. “I guess I started to feel like I was in the way.”

                “I think there’s still something you’re not telling me,” said Willow decisively. “Did she ask you to leave?”

                “No.”

                “Did you make a move on her?”

                “No,” Buffy repeated. “And why would that make me leave?”

                “If you got rejected-”

                “Well, I didn’t,” she offered flatly.

                “Because you’re clearly not over her,” Willow observed.

                “I never said I was, did I?”

                “And you don’t think maybe that’s what this is about?” asked Willow. “That maybe you’re doing this because-”

                “I’m doing this,” Buffy interrupted, “so that I can do it. It’s about having that moment and experiencing it and getting out of my system and then moving on.”

                “You think _this_ is the way you’re gonna get Faith out of your system?” said Willow wonderingly. “What, you saw how well it worked for Anya and decided to give it a go?”

                “What?” Buffy asked blankly. “What does Anya have to do with-”

                “That was her big plan when she came back to Sunnydale,” Willow informed her. “She was gonna get Xander out of her system.”

                “Oh.” This brought Buffy up short for a moment. “Well – I’m not her.”

                Willow rolled her eyes.

                “Well, I tried,” the witch decided with a sigh. “It’s pretty clear that you’ll do what you want do.”

                “So, can I have the wedge?” asked Buffy hopefully.

                “Yes,” Willow assured her, leaning forward to hand the hard drive to her friend. “And also,” she pulled something from her pocket. As Willow unfolded it, Buffy realized it was an airline ticket.

                “I already booked my flight to L.A.,” Buffy muttered.

                “It’s to Cleveland,” Willow corrected her.

                “Oh…” Buffy stared blankly as Willow passed her the ticket and the wedge.

                “It’s an open-ended ticket,” Willow stated informatively, “any time in the next year.”

                “I – thanks,” Buffy mumbled awkwardly.

                “It’s up to you, Buffy,” said Willow kindly, taking the Slayer’s hands between her own. “What you do is always up to you and you know I’ll be your friend no matter what you do. Just think about what it is that you really need, okay?”

                “Yeah…” said Buffy, eyes still glazed in thought.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**:::Present Day:::**

                Buffy fidgeted nervously as she waited. She wasn’t even sure when she had pulled out Willow’s airline ticket, but it wasn’t the first time she had done so in the past four days. Staring blankly down at it, she persistently folded and unfolded the well-worn rectangle while trying very hard to ignore the thoughts and doubts it was stirring in her mind.

                “Hey, B.”

                Buffy hurriedly stuffed the ticket into her pocket and out of sight.


	3. Echoes of Faith

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Buffy and "Faith" reconnect.

**Fandom**: BtVS/Dollhouse**  
Title**: Echoes of Faith  
**Chapter 3**: Echoes of Faith  
**Characters/Pairing**: Buffy/“Faith”, Echo  
**Rating**: PG-13ish, maybe R for language?  
**Warnings**: The slashing of the femmes begins here, but not very explicitly. Also some language.  
**Summary**: Buffy and “Faith” reconnect.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

                “Hey, B.”

                Even without the use of her nickname, Buffy would have recognized that particular Bostonian cadence anywhere. Faith’s voice had both graced and haunted her dreams for years. Even in waking moments, she would imagine Faith’s reactions to things from time to time. It was only here and now that she realized her mind had captured it less than perfectly as she shivered in response to the two simple words.

                Now it was time to discover how well she could lie to herself.

                “Faith.” Buffy smiled warmly as she turned to face the person who had spoken.

                It was truly amazing to observe the similarities between the two. Buffy doubted if she’d be able to tell them apart even if they were standing next to each other. The self-delusion was made much simpler by the uncanny resemblance of the doppelganger. Those gorgeous brown eyes held Buffy’s attention like little else could, though her exceptional breasts put up a hell of a fight in a tight-fitting black tank top. Her hair fell in waves and…

                “You have highlights?” Buffy questioned.

                “What, you don’t like ‘em?” Faith ran her fingers idly through her hair as she sat in the chair next to Buffy’s.

                “I just wasn’t expecting – they’re beautiful,” Buffy complimented. “Really.”

                “Yeah, yeah,” Faith waved a hand dismissively. “So, how’s it hangin’, princess?”

                “Tucked in my sock, and yours?” Buffy quipped with a grin.

                “Ow, and she comes out swingin’,” Faith mused.

                They both chuckled for a moment and then trailed off awkwardly as their eyes locked.

                “So – do you want coffee or something?” Buffy offered.

                “You payin’?” asked Faith.

                “Yeah,” Buffy replied, trying to sound casual.

                “Then you bet your tight ass I do.”

                “Excuse me,” Buffy grabbed the arm of a passing server, “two coffees please.”

                “Right away, ma’am,” he mumbled and walked off.

                “Everybody calls me ma’am these days,” Buffy reflected. “And I am not a tight ass,” she added defensively.

                “Hate to break it to ya, B, but you’re a tight ass and you’re old too,” said Faith somberly.

                “Are you even a whole year younger than me?”

                “Doesn’t matter, I’m a free-spirit,” Faith stated plainly, leaning back and stretching her arms behind her head.

                “Yeah, I’ve heard jail really brings that out in people,” said Buffy dryly.

                “No need to be bitter,” Faith reprimanded.

                “You keep insulting me and I might start thinking you don’t like me,” Buffy cautioned.

                “Hey, you’re the one who started in on my hair,” Faith countered playfully.

                “I love your hair,” Buffy defended, “it was just a surprise, that’s all. Come on, you know you’re gorgeous.”

                “Go on,” Faith encouraged.

                “Well…” Buffy pondered for a moment.

                “Your coffee, ma’am.” The server had returned and Faith chuckled slightly at the renewed use of the word “ma’am.”

                “That was quick,” Buffy complimented as she pulled a bill from her pocket. “Keep the change.”

                “You sure?” the server asked uncertainly.

                “What do I care?” said Buffy, waving her hand lazily.

                “Thanks,” said the server happily as he walked away again.

                “Dude, did you just give that guy a fifty?” asked Faith.

                “Not a tight ass,” Buffy restated definitively.

                “No, you’re a dumbass,” said Faith with a grin.

                “There’s just no pleasing you, is there?” Buffy commented as she began to sip at her coffee.

                “Not in that position,” Faith quipped. “Now if you wanna come over here…”

                Buffy coughed slightly and set her coffee cup down.

                “Ack,” she articulated, “I think I just burned my throat.”

                “Well, don’t drink so fast, blondie,” Faith teased, taking a slow, pretentious sip from her own cup and setting it down with a flourish. “So, L.A.,” she prompted after she swallowed, “you livin’ here or what?”

                “I’m here for now,” said Buffy with a shrug. “I’ve been moving around a lot since Cleveland.” She took a slower, more deliberate sip than before. “I was just in New York the other day to see Willow.”

                “But you make me come to L.A.?”

                “I bought your ticket,” Buffy pointed out. “And trust me, time away from the Hellmouth can be very therapeutic.”

                “And you would know this from that one time you left for an hour?” Faith questioned.

                “And that other time when I closed one,” Buffy countered.

                “And then hauled your ass straight to Cleveland.”

                “Everyone went to Cleveland,” Buffy reasoned.

                “And most of ‘em left too,” said Faith bluntly. “But you just had to have some of that wicked energy.”

                “That really wasn’t why I stayed,” said Buffy softly.

                “No, I know,” Faith assured her, tone leveling out slightly. “It’s kinda obvious why you stayed.”

                “What?” Buffy faltered for a moment. She had left a lot of leeway in the imprint, preferring to work for her moment so that it would feel more genuine, but this was the first thing to truly surprise her. Had she been that transparent?

                “I mean, it’s the same reason you wanted to see me today, right?” said Faith bluntly.

                “Well, I…” Buffy was unsure of how to respond.

                “I get it,” Faith told her, “you wanna keep an eye on me?”

                “Hamnu?” asked Buffy blankly.

                “And I get why you’re doin’ it, but I really don’t need a babysitter, ya know?”

                “God, I am so mentally challenged!” Buffy blurted out angrily, plopping her elbows onto the table and pressing her forehead against her palms.

                “Wha?” It was Faith’s turn to be confused.

                “Of _course_ she – you felt that way!” Buffy ranted, head snapping up again. “How I could I have not known that? God, I – Faith, I’m really sorry,” she offered with sincerity.

                “Chill, B,” said Faith nonchalantly, “we’re five by five.”

                “No, we’re not,” Buffy insisted. “Faith,” she reached forward and placed a hand over one of Faith’s, “I never meant to – to put you through that.”

                “It’s really not a big deal,” Faith answered with a shrug.

                Buffy sighed and pulled her hand back. She recognized that this was probably the parameters of the imprint talking; the real Faith would be angrier. ‘_I never meant to put you through that_’ – ‘_Well, you did!_’ That was the way the exchange played out in Buffy’s head.

                “I mean, damn, you look like you’re about to cry or somethin’,” Faith observed, the slightest hint of concern coloring her tone.

                “Oh, it’s – probably pollen in the air or something,” Buffy tried, impatiently drying her eyes on her sleeve.

                “Yeah,” said Faith blankly, “yeah, sure.” She took another sip of her coffee, buying time for thought. “Look, I – I probably just felt that way because – I don’t know, I was probably projecting or some stupid thing.”

                “Projecting?” Buffy questioned. “They teach you that one in prison?”

                “Actually, yeah,” Faith muttered.

                “Oh – well – so, what are you projecting?”

                “Come on,” Faith scoffed, thinking the answer was obvious. “We both know I’m a total fuck-up.”

                “That’s not-”

                “It is,” Faith cut her off. “I figured you were keeping an eye on me because deep down I know I deserve it.”

                “You _don’t_,” Buffy countered indignantly. “Faith, you have come so far since then.”

                “Yeah, well-”

                “I mean it,” said Buffy firmly, overstepping Faith’s dismissal. “I’ve seen how much you’ve changed. You’ve – become this – really wonderful person – and I always hoped you would be and that’s why it always made me so angry when you – but I…”

                “We don’t really have to-”

                “I need to,” Buffy spoke over her again. “This is why I stayed in Cleveland for so long. Why I – wanted to see you now. Do you know how many times I’ve wished we could talk like this? We’ve always been too damn stubborn to really have a conversation and I’m so…” Buffy trailed off, breathing deeply to calm herself. She had been about to say she was so sick of the way they didn’t talk, but here she was, still avoiding a real conversation with Faith.

                “I hear what you’re sayin’, B,” Faith assured her in a gentle tone that added a husky strain to her voice, “but I don’t know if I _can_ have this conversation. It really – fuck it, it scares me, okay?” Faith took another drink of coffee and deliberately looked anywhere but at Buffy.

                “It scares me too,” Buffy admitted quietly, “more than you know. I’m so close to just running away right now.” Whether she should run to the real Faith or just run away from both of them, she wasn’t sure. Of course, the real Faith would be even less likely to want to face the emotional tension between them.

                “Why did you wanna see me?” Faith prompted.

                “Because I…”

                “Come on, B,” Faith ordered. “You said you wanted to talk, so let’s do this thing.”

                “I…” Buffy opened and shut her mouth a few times.

                “Figures,” Faith complained. “Fly my ass up to L.A. and we still can’t do this, can we?”

                “I missed you,” Buffy half-whispered.

                “You _missed_ me?” Faith questioned. “What the hell does that even mean?”

                “I miss the way we used to be,” Buffy tried to explain. “Back before – everything – we were actually kind of close. Or I thought we were; I don’t know how you felt. And I think about you a lot. I think about what we used to have and – everything we never had and all I really want is to reconnect with you and get to know you better and try to leave all the stupid shit we both did behind us.”

                “What stupid shit did you do?” asked Faith curiously.

                “To you or in general?” Buffy countered. “How about we start with the part where I hit you in the face a whole bunch of times?”

                “Yeah, but we’re Slayers,” Faith reasoned, “that’s practically foreplay.”

                “Um…” Buffy blushed at this proclamation and took a large gulp of coffee, suddenly wishing it were ice water instead. “A-and there was that time I stabbed you,” she reminded, searching for a less awkward topic. “And all those stupid arguments we had when we were fighting The First. And – well, I’m sorry.”

                “You gotta admit I earned some of that stuff,” Faith pointed out.

                “I wish things hadn’t gone the way they did,” said Buffy solemnly. “All the time, I wonder what would have happened if I had done something different.”

                “When do you think you could’ve changed things?” said Faith bluntly. “It wasn’t _your_ choices that fucked things up, B.”

                “I think about – that night,” Buffy muttered, “when Alan Finch died. I think about it a lot.” She carefully met Faith’s eyes for a moment and then looked away. “I should’ve been there for you.”

                “You were,” said Faith softly. “I told you to piss off, remember?”

                “Maybe if I’d tried harder, if I’d just pushed a little more-”

                “Maybe,” Faith granted, talking over Buffy. “Or maybe we would’ve tried to kill each other sooner. We don’t get to know that stuff. All we’ve got is here and now.”

                “Well, here and now I really like you,” Buffy told her. “You’re a really wonderful person and I respect you. The person I see now makes me wish I’d been more understanding in the past. I want you to know that you’re worth it and that I should have been a better friend to you.” Buffy finally lost the fight against her tear ducts at this point and she blinked in frustration as they spilled over. “I’m sorry that it wasn’t me who helped you get through those things. It should’ve been.”

                “I don’t know what to say…” Faith mumbled quietly, discomforted by the sight of Buffy’s tears.

                “You don’t have to…” Buffy stopped midsentence and swallowed slowly. “God, I didn’t mean to get all weepy,” she reflected bitterly, grasping for her coffee.

                “It’s cool,” said Faith. “Sometimes you gotta let that shit out.”

                “Yeah, I guess-”

                “Can we hug?” Faith added suddenly.

                Buffy blinked.

                Faith moved her chair over and wrapped her arms around Buffy’s thin frame. After a moment, Buffy returned the embrace.

                “I don’t know if it’s worth anything,” Faith spoke softly into Buffy’s ear, “but I’m sorry too.”

                “It’s worth everything,” said Buffy shakily, wishing now that she had the courage to say these things to the real Faith and wondering if anything this comforting could come of it. “I really love you, Faith,” Buffy added as they pulled apart.

                “You sure that’s not an Irish coffee?” Faith quipped. Buffy chuckled appreciatively.

                “I mean it,” she stated boldly. “You’re so-”

                “If you say ‘wonderful’ one more time, I’m gonna kick your ass,” Faith threatened.

                “Fine, fine,” Buffy allowed, holding out her hands innocently. “I just thought you might like to hear it is all. You’re a hell of a woman.”

                “Yeah, well, I try to be my best,” Faith said casually.

                “I think you are,” Buffy assured her with a smile. “You okay?” she added, noticing a distant, thoughtful look as she met Faith’s eyes. “Faith?” she prompted.

                “Huh?” said Faith with a start. “Sorry, just – déjà vu or somethin’.” She shook her head slowly from side to side.

                “You got déjà vu from me complimenting you?” Buffy questioned with raised eyebrows.

                “I guess,” Faith mumbled. “And thanks, by the way. It means a lot.”

                “You’re welcome,” Buffy smiled again.

                “I’m glad you wanna – reconnect or whatever,” said Faith, staring down at her now empty coffee cup. “Probably could’ve made a better start on it if I wasn’t so... You know, thinkin’ you were there to keep an eye on me. Is there a word for that?”

                “Paranoid,” Buffy supplied promptly. “That’s me too, though. I think it’s a Slayer thing.”

                “Survival instincts, I guess,” said Faith.

                “Well, I won’t bite,” Buffy responded, “unless, of course, you ask me to,” she added with a coy grin.

                “You oughta bite that tongue,” Faith told her, “before it writes a check you can’t cash.”

                “I pay all my debts,” Buffy stated. “That actually doesn’t sound all that tough,” she contemplated as an afterthought.

                “Definitely not,” Faith agreed.

                There was a slightly awkward pause, which Buffy passed by draining the rest of her coffee.

                “So, what do you wanna do now?” asked Faith.

                “Now?” Buffy questioned, not completely clear on Faith’s meaning.

                “Now that – all this stuff’s out in the open,” she clarified. “I mean, were you wantin’ to come back to Cleveland or…”

                “I wouldn’t want to overstep,” Buffy mumbled.

                “I’d be cool with it,” Faith assured her. “If you wanna come, you should come. I wanna know you better too.”

                “There’s something else,” said Buffy slowly. “I-it’s not all out in the open yet. And – I really don’t even know how to _start_ saying this…”

                “Hey,” Faith leaned forward and placed both of her hands over one of Buffy’s, “just say it, okay. Whatever it is, you can tell me.”

                “Right,” Buffy sighed and then took a deep breath. “Okay then.” She held her silence, simply staring into Faith’s hypnotic brown eyes for a moment and taking further deep breaths that did nothing to calm her. Finally, she decided to simply start leaning forward. She shut her eyes as she pressed her lips to Faith’s, savoring the physical sensation of the action. Faith returned the pressure very tentatively, showing a tenderness that Buffy doubted the brunette would have shown with any other partner. Buffy lingered for several seconds before pulling back and opening her eyes; Faith’s expression was both stunned and thoughtful.

                “Well?” Buffy asker her.

                “B…” said Faith simply, face still frozen in the same expression.

                “One of these days I’m gonna teach you to say ‘uffy’.”

                Faith made no response but to raise her hand and softly touch her lips.

                “Why?” she managed finally.

                “Never had that reaction before,” Buffy noted.

                “Buffy,” said Faith softly. “Why me?”

                “What?”

                “I mean – you could do a hell of a lot better,” she answered.

                “I think we could be really good for each other,” said Buffy fervently. “If you don’t feel the same way, I’d understand, but I’d like to be with you and I wanted you to know that.”

                “I don’t – really know how I feel,” Faith confessed. “There’s definitely a part of me that wants it,” she assured the blonde, “I just…”

                “You’re afraid,” Buffy guessed.

                “I just – I’m not – damn it, I’m not wonderful, B,” Faith sighed in frustration, attempting to pull her hands back.

                “You _are_,” Buffy grasped one of Faith’s hands to keep her from pulling away. She looked to Faith’s eyes, which looked down at their linked hands. “Everyone makes mistakes, Faith,” said Buffy firmly, earning a fleeting glance. “It’s what people do. Believe me, I’ve made more than few. But you came back from those mistakes and they made you stronger. And I feel like I understand you so much better now and I think – because of the things we’ve been through – we’re just that much better for each other.”

                “We’re both fucked up so we should be together?” Faith questioned. “That’s warped, B.”

                “We both got _past_ being fucked up,” Buffy countered, “and that’s at least a good place to start. And if you want me even half as much as I want you, then we should find out what we can have,” she reasoned. “So – do you want me?”

                Whether or not the real Faith wanted her, Buffy knew that the imprint wouldn’t be able to deny this parameter; it was just a matter of working with Faith’s persona now.

                “Yeah,” Faith’s answer was barely more than a whisper.

                “Well, a good friend once told me: want, take, have.”

                “B…”

                “Just shut up and kiss me.”

                “You think I’m gonna do it just ‘cause you tell me to?” Faith challenged, leaning forward slightly.

                “You’ll do it because you want to,” Buffy replied, grinning coyly, “but you know I like to give orders.”

                “You’re such a bitch sometimes,” Faith told her, so close now that their noses were nearly touching.

                “What do you want to do about it?” retorted Buffy.

                Faith tilted her head slightly and closed the gap between them. Buffy responded ardently as their mouths opened and the intensity of the kiss escalated. Faith brought a hand up to Buffy’s face and Buffy relished the physical intimacy that sent waves of heat racing through her body. She mirrored the gesture, breathing heavily now and feeling her face flush with arousal.

                “Would you two like a refill? They’re half-price.”

                The server had returned again. Buffy and Faith pulled apart.

                “No, we’re good,” Buffy panted. “We should – probably go, huh?”

                “You don’t have to,” he answered. “It’s not like you’re the first couple to make out in a coffee shop. I just have to pitch the refills to people with empty cups.” He collected the cups in question and left quietly.

                “Wanna bail?” Buffy asked.

                “I’m thinkin’ they’d probably kick us out once I got you naked,” Faith replied thoughtfully.

                “What do you say we take this back to my room?” Buffy offered, raising her eyebrows suggestively.


	4. Well, it *is* a Fantasy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Porn!"

**Fandom**: BtVS/Dollhouse**  
Title**: Echoes of Faith  
**Chapter 4**: Well, it *is* a Fantasy  
**Characters/Pairing**: Buffy/“Faith”, Echo  
**Rating**: NC-17  
**Warnings**: Explicit femslash. Also, some brief biting.  
**Summary**: “Porn!”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

                Buffy found her back pressed against the inside of the door to her hotel room as it closed. She locked the door, fumbling blindly as Faith had chosen that moment to reclaim her lips and thoroughly distract her. They stumbled together into the room, moving slowly and refusing to break their kiss for anything. Buffy felt one of Faith’s hands against the small of her back, holding her closely, and she responded by kissing back fiercely, entangling her fingers in Faith’s hair.

                ‘_What am I doing_?’ Buffy thought to herself. ‘_This is so wrong_.’ Breathing passionately through her nose, she continued kissing while her mind and body fought each other. ‘_But _God,_ I can’t wait to feel that tongue…_’ Her body burned with desire as Faith’s hand moved under the back of her shirt. Just the sensation of touch, even a hand on her back, was enough to make Buffy moan into Faith’s mouth.

                ‘_Is this all the imprint or is there some part of Faith that wants this too?_’ she continued to ponder as Faith’s other hand started trying to push Buffy’s coat off her shoulders. ‘_It’s probably crossed her mind, at least_.’ Buffy disentangled herself slightly, still lacking the will-power to break the kiss. Instead, she assisted Faith with the removal of her coat. ‘_Maybe we really could make it work. I know all this stuff about her now and – ooh. Hello, hand._’ Faith’s left hand was now under the front of Buffy’s shirt, sliding slowly over her abdomen.

                ‘_I should probably be more involved here_,’ Buffy reflected. ‘_I can’t believe I’m going through with this_.’ She grabbed Faith’s hips, trying to hold her even more closely than before. When Faith’s legs bumped the foot of the bed, she obligingly leaned back on to the mattress and Buffy followed. Their lips separated at long last and Buffy moved down to Faith’s neck as they both panted for breath. ‘_This is _definitely_ what I need_,’ Buffy decided, feeling herself shiver as Faith gasped in pleasure. ‘_Just gotta stick to the plan here. Do it. Enjoy the hell out of it. Move on._’

                “Ahh, B,” Faith groaned. “This is – really great,” she managed between breaths, “I just…”

                “Hm?” Buffy stopped kissing and sat up to meet Faith’s eyes. “What’s wrong?”

                “Nothing,” Faith assured her quickly, sitting up against the headboard, “it’s great. I’ve just…”

                “What?” asked Buffy gently.

                “I’ve never done this before,” Faith admitted quietly.

                “What?” Buffy half-laughed in reply. “Faith, that’s sweet, but we both know it’s not true.”

                “I meant with a chick, smartass,” Faith retorted.

                “Oh,” Buffy responded blankly. “Wait, really?” she added. “Because you’re practically the poster girl for bisexuality.”

                “That’s – I don’t know, sexist or something,” Faith began in indignation, but finished somewhat lamely.

                “I just figured you probably – but it’s fine that you haven’t,” Buffy offered readily. “I haven’t either. I mean, you’re the only woman I’ve ever really even been attracted to. But I’m not really very nervous about this. Are you?”

                “Not nervous really,” Faith told her, “I just…” she fell silent. Buffy made no reply, waiting patiently to hear what was on Faith’s mind. “I really care about you, B,” she said at last, barely above a whisper. “And I always screw everything up – especially between us – and I don’t want that to happen.”

                ‘_I can’t do this_,’ the thought came unbidden to Buffy’s mind. ‘_Oh God, I can’t do this. If Faith’s feeling any of these things then I really need to go and see her._’

                “Are we even still talking about sex?” Buffy questioned somewhat dazedly.

                “I don’t know,” said Faith. “I think we’re talkin’ about me and you. If we do this – it’s gonna mean something, B.”

                “Yeah.”

                “And I’m really afraid I’m gonna end up hurtin’ you or something.”

                ‘_Well of course you’re afraid,_’ Buffy thought, ‘_you’re imprinted not to hurt me._’ She sighed as this crossed her mind. ‘_Who am I kidding? Faith isn’t thinking any of this._’ Her eyes were drawn to Faith’s right arm. ‘_No tattoo_.’ She hadn’t even noticed it before, but now it seemed so glaringly obvious. The imprint probably didn’t even realize she was missing anything, just like she believed in those highlights. ‘_This was never Faith. I can’t believe I actually let myself buy into this stupid fantasy. I should’ve had them make a therapist instead… God, why does this hurt so much? This is supposed to be about getting over Faith, not figuring her out. I just need to move on. It’s not like I’m in love with her…_’

                “You okay, B?” asked Faith, concerned about Buffy’s continued silence.

                “No,” Buffy managed feebly.

                “What is it?” Faith held a hand up to Buffy’s face and cupped her cheek, like a lover might do.

                “I’m in love,” Buffy answered, voice strained and eyes welling with tears.

                “Buffy…” Faith was at a loss.

                “Oh God,” Buffy lamented, “I didn’t even realize I felt anything this deep and now I’m in love. I’m in love with a girl who doesn’t even want me.”

                “Hey,” Faith nudged Buffy’s chin so their eyes locked, “I want you.”

                “No,” Buffy countered, swallowing hard against the lump in her throat. Faith didn’t want her.

                “I didn’t mean anything like that,” said Faith reassuringly. “I definitely want you. I’m not good with feelings, but I care about you a lot and I feel all this really deep, complicated shit when we’re together. Do you really think I would’ve come up to your room just like that if I hadn’t _always_ wanted you?”

                “Just stop it,” Buffy insisted, drying her eyes angrily. Faith didn’t want her.

                “I’m just tryin’ to be what you need,” Faith explained. “I really don’t know what I’m doin’ here, okay. And not just the gay stuff,” she qualified. “I mean, I’m not exactly good at relationships,” Faith continued. “The closest I ever came was with Paul.”

                “Who?” asked Buffy in confusion.

                “Robin,” said Faith.

                “You said Paul,” Buffy informed her.

                “Did I?”

                “Who’s Paul?” asked Buffy, curiosity getting the better of her.

                “How the hell should I know?” Faith replied with a shrug. “And stop tryin’ to change the subject,” she added.

                “What? Relationships?” Buffy challenged dryly.

                “Yeah,” said Faith softly. “Isn’t that what you want?”

                “More than anything,” Buffy answered in complete honesty. “I’m so tired of being lonely.”

                “Then let’s stop,” Faith suggested decisively. “I’ll work for it if you will. Just let me be what you need.”

                “I don’t know if I can,” Buffy answered tentatively.

                Faith leaned forward and pressed her lips to Buffy’s, lingering for only a moment before pulling back.

                “Try,” Faith requested.

                Faith didn’t want her…but the imprint still did.

                “Okay,” Buffy answered, moving in to return the kiss.

                “And B?” Faith interrupted before Buffy could close the gap.

                “Yeah?”

                “About the sex part,” she mumbled, “you’ll tell me if I fuck up, right?”

                “Don’t I always tell you when you fuck up?” Buffy retorted.

                “Yeah,” Faith agreed, grinning slightly.

                “So, let’s fuck already.”

                Buffy smashed her lips against Faith’s, kissing with a ferocious energy. Wet smacking noises filled the room as their mouths opened and their tongues took over the task of fighting out the constant tension that had always existed between them. Buffy was past caring that it wasn’t Faith, simply craving the solace.

                ‘_I can still enjoy this_,’ Buffy assured herself. ‘_I just have to draw the line, that’s all._’ Supporting her weight with her left hand, her right hand moved up to cup and squeeze one of Faith’s breasts. ‘_I can enjoy it as much as I want, just like I planned. I just have to remember that it’s not Faith._’

                Not-Faith’s hands found the bottom of Buffy’s shirt and began slowly tugging it upwards. Reluctantly, Buffy broke the kiss, allowing for the convenient removal of the shirt. Her hand returned to Faith’s chest, prodding for the exact location of her nipple as she tossed the shirt aside. Faith started kissing Buffy’s neck now, licking and sucking in an alternating pattern.

                “Ahh, God,” Faith moaned as Buffy found her target and gently rolled the nipple between her fingers and the layers of clothing. “Wishin’ I hadn’t worn a bra right now,” Faith voiced pensively.

                “I think we can fix that,” said Buffy with a smile.

                She sat back slightly, allowing Faith to lean forward from the headboard as her shirt was pulled over her head.

                “How about that? We match,” Buffy mused. They were both wearing similar black bras, though Faith filled hers out to an almost ridiculous degree of perfection, causing Buffy to stare.

                “Yeah, but unlike you, I wore black on black,” Faith pointed out. “That way no one can see it through my white t-shirt.”

                “You know it turned you on,” Buffy countered, forcing her gaze back upward.

                “Yeah, it really did,” Faith admitted with a smile and leaned in for another kiss. Her fingers trailed slowly up Buffy’s sides, eliciting shivers before moving around to unhook her bra. Buffy followed Faith’s lead and then they began sliding the respective shoulder straps down each other’s arms, which led to some unfortunate tangling as they reached their hands. Eventually both bras were tossed aside carelessly and both girls began groping for each other’s bare breasts.

                “Ohh, God,” Buffy panted as their lips separated again. Faith kissed her way back down Buffy’s neck again. “I love you, Faith.”

                ‘_This is my fantasy and I’m gonna do it right_,’ Buffy thought to herself decisively.

                “I love you too,” Faith mumbled between kisses. “God, I love you so much, B.”

                “Shut up,” Buffy ordered.

                Suddenly, Faith flipped their positions, leaving Buffy flat on her back with Faith straddling her hips.

                “Fuck you,” Faith stated boldly.

                “Promise?” asked Buffy, eyes alight with the possibilities.

                Their lips met again. Buffy’s right hand snaked between them, grasping Faith’s left breast and gently teasing the nipple with her thumb. Faith’s breathing quickened and she pulled away from the kiss, panting heavily. She rested against Buffy’s shoulder, occasionally groaning into the blonde girl’s ear and increasing her arousal. After a moment, Faith leaned in, teasing Buffy’s earlobe with the tip of her tongue. Buffy shuddered slightly as her breathing faltered under Faith’s care.

                “God, I’m so horny right now,” Buffy exclaimed. “I want you so much.”

                “Me too, B.” Faith turned when she felt Buffy’s legs move and saw that Buffy was trying to kick off her shoes with little success. “Let me,” Faith offered. She moved back, settling onto her knees at the foot of the bed. Extending Buffy’s right leg, she quickly removed a shoe and sock before leaning in to kiss the newly exposed ankle. Her hands moved back and forth along Buffy’s still-covered calf, gently massaging the tense and powerful muscles.

                “I have another shoe, you know,” Buffy pointed out, nudging the side of Faith’s head with her foot.

                “What’s the,” she paused as she kissed Buffy’s ankle again, “rush?”

                “Well, I was hoping you might want to get in my pants,” said Buffy levelly, “but if you never take off my other shoe, it could be kind of tough.”

                “Oh,” said Faith, “and what makes you think I wanna get in your pants?” One hand slid beneath the leg of Buffy’s pants, still caressing her calf.

                “Well, if you’d rather have tea and crackers…” Buffy teased.

                “Is that what they’re callin’ it now?” asked Faith.

                “God, I hope not,” said Buffy thoughtfully. “But the point is: do you want to fuck me or not?”

                “No,” said Faith softly. Buffy’s eyes widened in question. “I wanna make love to you.”

                “God, you sound like a damn romance novel,” Buffy complained. “To hell with the words. Me. You. Sex. Now.” Buffy pulled her leg away so that she could sit up properly.

                “Anyone ever mention you got a way with words?” Faith noted.

                “Oh yeah?” Buffy grinned as their faces moved closer again.

                “You had me at ‘sex’,” said Faith with a wicked grin of her own.

                “Well, you had me at ‘hey, B’,” Buffy informed her.

                “If it’s that easy then do I really need the ‘uffy’ part?” Faith challenged.

                “I’m a package deal,” said Buffy with a pout. “You can’t have ‘B’ without ‘uffy’. It’d be like – like taking off my shirt, but not my pants.”

                “Again with the pants?” Faith sighed in mock-frustration. “Damn, B, don’t you ever think about anything besides sex?”

                “Not when you’re around,” Buffy answered as she moved to Faith’s neck and started kissing some more.

                “You do make a convincing argument,” Faith noted as Buffy’s tongue dipped into the hollow of her neck. “What else you got?”

                “Oh,” Buffy mumbled as she kissed and licked, “just you wait.” One hand trailed slowly up Faith’s stomach and then cupped her right breast.

                “Uhhh,” Faith groaned as Buffy pressed the nipple with her thumb and gently rolled it in circles. Buffy’s kisses were slowly headed down Faith’s chest now as it rose and fell with her increased anticipation. Her path moved toward Faith’s left nipple, hoping to give each of them equal attention. Faith let out a second, more primal groan as Buffy’s tongue traced a circle around her areola. Her back arched in an effort to offer herself more fully to Buffy’s tantalizing touch.

                “Let’s make you more comfortable,” Buffy suggested, moving away as Faith moved in, maintaining an elusive air of seduction. As she moved out of the way, she smoothed the sheets on the bed in a clear gesture that Faith should occupy that space. Buffy dealt with her own remaining footwear as Faith stretched out on her back and then she proceeded to do the same for Faith. Her hands pushed slowly up Faith’s thighs, over her black jeans.

                “Ahh, God,” Faith sighed. “So wet for you, B.”

                “What’s my name?” Buffy asked, pressing the seam of Faith’s jeans against her pussy, reveling in the warmth she felt there.

                “Ohhh, fuck you,” Faith muttered.

                “Fuck who?”

                Faith pressed her lips together tightly.

                “B,” she repeated emphatically.

                “Is that right?” Buffy hooked a single finger beneath the waistband of Faith’s jeans and dragged it slowly across her stomach.

                “Yeah, that’s right, _B_,” said Faith, deliberately stressing the nickname.

                “Well, F,” Buffy replied, “do you want me to take off your pants?” Her finger now traced down the seam of the jeans, applying just enough pressure to make her presence felt.

                “You’ll take ‘em off,” said Faith calmly.

                “You think so, huh?” Buffy started kissing Faith’s stomach, just above the waistband of her jeans. Her right hand gently caressed Faith’s outer thigh, moving back in forth in a steady rhythm.

                “I _know_ so,” Faith assured her.

                “And why’s that?” Buffy prompted.

                “Because you want to,” said Faith with confidence. “You want my pants off a lot more than you wanna hear me say your name.”

                “Oh, F,” said Buffy lightly, walking her middle and index fingers up Faith’s abdomen.

                “Stop callin’ me ‘F’,” Faith protested, “it just sounds weird when you do it.”

                “The thing is, F,” Buffy mumbled as her kisses moved up Faith’s body, “do you know,” kiss, “how many,” kiss, “people,” kiss, “have underestimated me?” She was nearing Faith’s breasts now. “And they always lose,” she stated defiantly, eyes locked with Faith’s.

                “You know you want me.”

                “Is that what you’re used to?” asked Buffy. “People who want you so bad that nothing else matters?”

                “Don’t deny it,” said Faith smugly.

                “Oh, I want you,” Buffy assured her, fingers now tracing patterns on Faith’s chest. “I want you _bad_,” she moved up further until her breath was hot in Faith’s ear. “I want to rip off your clothes and fuck you ‘til you scream,” she whispered. “I wanna feel your warm pussy wrapped around my fingers and hear you beg me for more.”

                “Oh, fuck, B,” Faith panted as Buffy started nibbling at her earlobe.

                “Do you want me to do those things to you, Faith?” Buffy purred as she moved down to Faith’s neck. “Do you want me to lick you?” She traced Faith’s jaw line with the tip of her tongue. “Tell me you want it.”

                “I want you, B.”

                Their lips connected yet again and their tongues pressed against each other in a battle of wills. Buffy brought her right hand to Faith’s left breast and lightly caressed the area with the backs of her fingers. Faith tried to suppress the shiver that ran through her body, but Buffy felt it. Grinning against Faith’s lips, Buffy traced her index finger in a gentle circle around Faith’s areola. A guttural groan passed from Faith’s mouth to Buffy’s as they kissed and Buffy relished the sounds of Faith’s pleasure.

                Faith’s hand snaked between them, sliding downwards until Buffy felt it reach the button on her pants. Buffy started to mumble into the kiss, but decided she didn’t care if Faith wanted to continue. Her stomach involuntarily jumped as Faith brushed against a ticklish spot while fumbling with the button. As Buffy relaxed, Faith eased down her zipper, stirring a different tension that made each of Buffy’s muscles tighten briefly in anticipation.

                After a few fruitless attempts to remove Buffy’s pants with one hand, Faith brought the other hand down to assist in the task. She got the pants down to Buffy’s knees, which were resting on the bed, preventing the complete removal. Faith tried to caress Buffy’s legs, but their positioning didn’t facilitate much action on that front. Their lips finally separated and Buffy shifted so that she could kick off her pants. Once she had managed that, she settled in next to Faith’s left side and started kissing her shoulder. Faith was panting from Buffy’s treatment and seemed temporarily unable to form words in her delirium. Buffy’s lips worked their way downward once again and Faith inhaled sharply as Buffy reached her nipple. Buffy gently suckled the hardened bud.

                “Ohh, Buf – damn it,” Faith stopped herself mid-moan.

                “Mmmm.” Even the syllable sounded smug as Buffy grinned, causing her teeth to brush against the nipple she was sucking.

                Faith rolled onto her side and Buffy was forced to shift her attention to the other, more accessible nipple. Buffy’s right hand began stroking Faith’s hair while her left came to rest on Faith’s hip in an attempt to pull her even closer. Faith grasped one of Buffy’s breasts and rolled the nipple back and forth under her thumb. Buffy arched into the touch, feeling an exquisite sense of exertion as her shoulder blades tightened and released.

                “Bold choice,” Faith noted. Buffy’s mouth left the nipple so she could look at Faith’s face in question. “The non-matching panties,” Faith indicated with a nod.

                “What?” Buffy looked down at her simple, white thong. “Damn it,” she sighed. “I don’t know why I thought I had on the black pair.”

                “Don’t worry about it, B,” said Faith, “it’s not like you’re gonna have ‘em on for long anyway.” Faith’s hand started moving slowly over Buffy’s flat stomach.

                “You always say exactly what I need to hear,” Buffy answered with a grin.

                “I try to be my best,” said Faith warmly, leaning in to kiss Buffy’s neck.

                “So good,” Buffy exhaled breathily. She writhed under Faith’s touch as the brunette’s hand neared the waistband of her panties. Faith’s hand slipped beneath the article of clothing and Buffy suddenly felt self-conscious about her pubic hair. She worried that perhaps Faith would be turned off, but then she reminded herself that this wasn’t Faith. This was a doll, imprinted to love everything about her.

                “Feels nice,” Faith mumbled predictably as she continued planting kisses on Buffy’s neck. Buffy would have taken some time to reflect on the doll’s flattery, but she was quickly distracted as Faith’s middle finger traced up and down her labia.

                “Uhhh,” she groaned. “F-feels nicer.”

                “Yeah?” Faith verified. “You like what I’m doing to ya?” Her finger continued in a tantalizingly slow up and down motion.

                “It’s been so long,” Buffy panted. “So long – since anyone else…”

                “You get lonely, girlfriend?” asked Faith, tone trapped somewhere between provocative and concerned. “Did you get wet when we went slaying together in Cleveland? Come home and reach down to deal with those needs? Run those little fingers over your clit just wishin’ they were mine?”

                “Yesss,” Buffy hissed as Faith continued to tease her.

                “And back in the day?” Faith continued. “When you were too scared to admit that slaying got you off, did you think of me?”

                “Uhhh, God!” Buffy moaned as Faith’s middle finger slipped inside her.

                “Tell me,” Faith insisted. “Tell me you went home and rubbed your slit, tryin’ not to think about me.”

                “Faaaith.”

                “Tell me you never came so hard as when you thought of me.”

                “You – wish,” Buffy managed between pants.

                “Tell me, Buffy.”

                “Finally!” Buffy gasped.

                Faith barely had time to blink before Buffy moved, pulling the brunette’s hand away. She rolled on top of Faith and started kissing her neck. As Buffy kissed, her hands went quickly for the button on Faith’s jeans and unbuttoned it.

                “Damn,” Faith grunted as she realized what had happened.

                “I told you I always win,” Buffy pointed out, her kisses moving up as her hands moved down to the zipper.

                “You gotta tell me,” Faith persisted.

                “Did I think about you back then?” Buffy repeated. “Did I lie about those low-fat yogurts? Were you so damned irresistible that I had to think about you when I touched myself?”

                “Tell me,” Faith ordered, half-moaning and damaging the authority in her voice.

                “You sure you want to know?” asked Buffy, sitting up and tugging at the jeans.

                “Yes,” said Faith assertively, lifting her hips so Buffy could remove her jeans at long last.

                “Well,” Buffy feigned thought as she slowly pulled the jeans off of Faith’s legs and tossed them to the ever-growing pile of clothes, “the honest truth is,” she leaned down so she could speak into Faith’s ear, “no.”

                “No?”

                “Never back then,” said Buffy plainly, kissing the area beneath Faith’s ear, “not in that way.”

                “Really?”

                “Sorry.” Buffy kissed Faith’s cheek.

                “Well, when then?” asked Faith impatiently, barely noticing Buffy’s hand on her stomach.

                “Mostly while we were in Cleveland together,” Buffy admitted. “And once in Sunnydale.”

                “When in Sunnydale?” Faith demanded.

                “It was – when I showed you the Scythe. And then we were talking about how lonely it was being the leader and – it just popped into my head.”

                “And?”

                “Who says there’s an ‘and’?” Buffy challenged, a single finger tracing the lacy waistband of Faith’s black panties.

                “There’s an ‘and’,” Faith stated confidently.

                “I thought about it,” Buffy confessed. “That’s definitely when I started to see you differently.”

                “Come on, you know what I wanna know,” Faith told her.

                “That night – I thought about what it would be like – being with you.”

                “And by ‘night’ you mean you were doin’ yourself, right?”

                “No,” said Buffy flatly.

                “You’re supposed to be turnin’ me on here, B,” Faith pointed out.

                “Oh, so I’m not?” asked Buffy, pressing Faith’s panties against her hot skin.

                “Fuck me,” Faith gasped.

                “We’ll get to that,” Buffy assured her.

                “So what do you mean you thought about being with me?”

                “I – fantasized,” Buffy supplied. “Just, not with the touching. I mean, I was sharing a bed with Spike; I couldn’t exactly fuck myself without him noticing.”

                “But you wanted to?” asked Faith hopefully.

                “Hell yes,” said Buffy immediately. “That’s why I knew I couldn’t sleep in my room with you there. I might have – done something impulsive.”

                “Impulsive,” said Faith slowly, “you mean like puttin’ your hand down my pants.”

                “Is that what you want?” Buffy traced her index finger up the front of Faith’s panties, feeling her labia imprinted against the soft material. “Are you ready to scream my name so loud that the people downstairs blush? You wanna let this whole hotel know who’s fucking you? Do you want me, Faith?”

                “Wore my matching underwear and everything,” Faith quipped with a grin.

                “Oh, fuck you.”

                Buffy grasped the waistband of Faith’s panties and pulled. The sensation of the waistband pulled tight against Faith’s lower back was just shy of painful, but the material quickly gave way to Buffy’s incredible strength and she tossed the tattered garment away. Buffy spent a moment staring at Faith’s naked form. She was shaved and her labia were a light pink color, making them stand out against the pale skin around them. Faith was visibly wet and the sight excited Buffy more than she thought it would. Buffy’s index finger traced the labia from top to bottom and Faith moaned.

                “Come on, B,” she pleaded as Buffy’s finger went up and down. “Want you so bad.” Faith writhed on the bed, trying to press herself against Buffy’s finger.

                “Tell me what you want,” Buffy instructed.

                “I want that finger in my pussy,” Faith replied. “Now.”

                “Like this?” Buffy slipped her finger inside, reveling in the moisture. She felt her own face flush with excitement at this intimate touch. Faith’s inner muscles clenched around the finger briefly, but slowly loosened their grip as Buffy pushed in and out in a gentle back and forth motion.

                “God, yes,” Faith groaned passionately.

                Their eyes locked.

                “I’m gonna make you remember this,” Buffy pledged, pressing her thumb firmly against Faith’s clit. Feeling less confident than she sounded, Buffy eased up slightly, afraid that too much pressure might not be as enjoyable for Faith as it was for her. She found it difficult to maintain a thrusting rhythm and pay attention to Faith’s clit, so she brought her other hand into the mix, teasing Faith’s clit in gentle side-to-side motions with her finger.

                “Harder,” gasped Faith.

                “Harder,” Buffy repeated. “Uh – which one harder?”

                “Inside.”

                “Right.” Buffy increased the thrusting pace of her finger, occasionally angling it slightly in an attempt to test the sensation of other areas. Each thrust caused a wet suction sound that served to turn Buffy on even further. As her arm grew tired, she pulled her finger out and laid her hand on Faith’s thigh, simply holding her steady. Her left hand took over the work of thrusting now and she leaned in closer. Tentatively, she pressed the tip of her tongue against Faith’s clit.

                “Uhhh,” Faith grunted pleasurably. Gaining confidence, Buffy tried moving her tongue up and down rapidly, lightly brushing Faith’s clit with each stroke as she tried to replicate sensations and actions that she had always enjoyed when they were done to her. Faith seemed to concur with Buffy’s preferences, judging by her increased moaning. Faith’s thigh trembled beneath Buffy’s hand and Buffy felt her own thighs clench in response.

                “Up,” said Faith.

                “Huh?” Buffy questioned, pressing her tongue flat against Faith’s clit.

                “Inside,” Faith explained, inhaling sharply in response to Buffy’s tongue. “Sorta up and to the right.” Buffy tried it. “My right,” Faith corrected. “Ohhh, that’s the spot,” Faith encouraged when Buffy’s finger hit the mark. “Now just – ahhh, God! Yeah, that’s good.” Buffy’s finger continued to work as she placed her lips around Faith’s clit and gently sucked. “Damn, you learn quick,” Faith sighed. Buffy felt a subtle increase in wetness and smiled against Faith at the signs of her pleasure. “Now pinch my clit.”

                “What?” Buffy’s mouth pulled back so that she could look to Faith’s face.

                “Finger inside, thumb outside,” instructed Faith, “act like you’re tryin’ to pinch it.”

                “Are you sure?”

                “Do it!” Buffy began tentatively. “Harderrrr,” Faith moaned, both legs shaking on either side of Buffy’s body. “Oh, God. Oh, Buffy! Oh, God! Oh – ahhh fuuuck!” There were two muted thuds as Faith’s hands the mattress and she gripped the sheets. Buffy stared, slightly awed by the way Faith arched and writhed, gasping incoherent syllables in an effort to articulate her pleasure. Feeling slick, warm muscle pressing around her finger on all sides, Buffy felt as though she was truly a part of something beautiful. Accomplishment shone in her face as she met Faith’s eyes and observed the last flames of pleasure flickering there.

                “I love you,” said Buffy softly, taken aback by the joy in Faith’s eyes. Faith’s muscles rippled around Buffy’s finger, slowly loosening along with the rest of Faith’s body as her head sank into the pillow behind her. Buffy’s finger slowly withdrew. Faith panted for several moments and Buffy’s gaze was drawn to Faith’s chest as it rose and fell with each breath.

                “Love you too,” Faith managed. Then, after a pause, “Hey, dumbass, I’m up here.”

                “Oh!” Buffy’s eyes quickly returned to Faith’s face. “Sorry. It’s just – you know – boobs.”

                “Boobs?” Faith laughed. “What are you, a twelve-year-old boy?”

                “What do you want me to say? Breasts?” Buffy questioned.

                “Yeah, and then go put on your corset, Queen Victoria,” Faith retorted.

                “There really is no pleasing you,” Buffy sighed.

                “Not in that position-”

                “You _just_ came,” said Buffy with a roll of her eyes.

                “Damn right, I did.” Faith stretched languidly, releasing the tension from each of her muscles. “And did I mention holy _fuck_ that was good?”

                “You look so amazing when you come,” Buffy told her. “It really turned me on.”

                “Turned you on, huh?” Faith grinned as she stretched and placed her hands behind her head on the pillow, the picture of ease. “Sounds like someone oughta do something about that.”

                “Maybe someone should,” Buffy agreed with a wide grin of her own as she crawled over Faith. Their eyes locked and Buffy felt a small tremor race up her spine in anticipation of the promises behind Faith’s gorgeous brown eyes. She leaned in closer, just barely allowing her lips to brush against Faith’s before pulling back again.

                “So, tell me,” requested Buffy, “did you ever think about me?”

                “You know I did,” Faith stated plainly.

                “Tell me about the first time.”

                “I don’t remember,” said Faith with a shrug. “It feels like it’s kinda been always, you know.”

                “Always?” asked Buffy, slightly surprised by the answer.

                “Sorta on and off, I guess,” Faith explained, “but yeah.”

                “On and off?” Buffy shifted to lie next to Faith again, fingers gently tracing her patterns in her lover’s stomach.

                “Yeah. Just sometimes when I had to do it myself, I’d think about you.”

                “Even back then?” Buffy questioned. “Even when we were enemies?”

                “You’re fuckin’ hot, B,” Faith pointed out. “Hell, even when we were fightin’ I wasn’t sure if I wanted to kill you or fuck you.”

                “But wouldn’t that mess with the whole dark side thing?”

                “Well, it wasn’t like being girlfriends was part of the fantasy,” said Faith bluntly.

                “Oh.” Buffy frowned slightly.

                “Hey,” Faith rolled onto her side and held a hand to Buffy’s cheek, “it is now.”

                ‘_Not Faith, not Faith, not Faith,_’ Buffy reminded herself mentally.

                “I think you’re right about us being good for each other,” Faith continued in a soft and husky tone. “You know this isn’t just sex, right?”

                ‘_Yes it is,_’ thought Buffy sadly, almost wishing she could keep the doll.

                “I really care about you,” Faith assured her. “And I know I’ve got history, but I would never use you like that.”

                ‘_God, I wish I could stop thinking long enough to enjoy this_.’

                “I know,” Buffy half-whispered. “I know you care. And not to undermine that, but – yeah that,” said Buffy as Faith started kissing her neck. “God, I’m so ready for this.”

                “Oh, I’ll get ya there, babe,” Faith pledged.

                “Babe?” asked Buffy dryly.

                “Sweetheart?” Faith tried, pulling away from Buffy’s neck and meeting a skeptical expression. “Hot stuff?”

                “Buf-fy,” the Slayer articulated.

                “Does that turn you on?” Faith asked doubtfully.

                “When _you_ say it,” Buffy informed her. “It really does.”

                “Buffy,” said Faith with a grin that Buffy happily reflected.

                “Now lower,” requested Buffy.

                “What?”

                “Your voice. Do it all low and husky.”

                “Husky?” Faith questioned, raising an eyebrow. Buffy simply nodded as Faith leaned in. “Buffy Anne Summers,” Faith’s voice was low and soft in Buffy’s ear, causing her to shiver. “You’re about to come so hard you forget that name.”

                “I didn’t even – ooh,” she moaned slightly as Faith started nibbling her earlobe, “I didn’t even realize you knew the Anne part.”

                “I pay attention, B,” Faith explained, “especially to you.”

                “Any time you want to stop being so perfect, go right ahead,” Buffy told her, only half-joking.

                Faith made no reply, but resumed her kissing, starting just below Buffy’s ear and working downward. Buffy’s moan was nearly a purr as Faith’s lips seemed to inject pure contentment into her body. Left hand supporting her weight on the bed, Faith’s right hand cupped Buffy’s left breast, gently stroking her flesh. Each touch earned soft sighs from Buffy’s lips as she tried to focus herself solely on the physical sensations. Her head lolled in pleasure as she searched for anything that could distract her from the contrived qualities of the imprint and her thoughts about the woman she couldn’t have.

                Buffy’s body tensed as Faith’s tongue pressed against her neck and licked. It was not an overtly erotic lick, but concentrated pressure from the tip of Faith’s tongue that caused Buffy’s entire nervous system to react in a variety of ways. She knew exactly what Faith was doing and why she was doing it. Faith’s tongue had just played connect the dots with two faded puncture scars on Buffy’s neck.

                “That turns you on, doesn’t it?” Faith mumbled, kissing around the area.

                “I don’t know,” Buffy gasped, slightly disoriented by Faith’s actions.

                “Some things never change, huh?”

                “What?”

                “B, if something makes you feel good, you oughta enjoy it,” said Faith before kissing some more.

                “But it’s,” Buffy panted as Faith’s tongue swiped across the area again, “it’s fucking weird.”

                “Who cares?” muttered Faith. “Just you and me.” She pulled back to speak. “Is it weirder that you get off on this or that I do?” she challenged. “You wouldn’t even have those marks if it wasn’t for what I did.” More kisses covered the area, each one soft and tender. Buffy could feel a message in Faith’s actions that intensified her pleasure, repeated with each kiss: I’m sorry.

                “Faith,” said Buffy gently, unsure of how to respond. “Ohhh, _God_ yes!” she added suddenly as Faith bit her, applying a gentle, unyielding pressure. Time seemed to stand still for a brief moment as Buffy’s body writhed, muscles tightening in an ecstatic rush of adrenaline and passion, spurring each other on to greater heights. “Guh!” Buffy huffed when Faith finally let up. “Holy God!”

                “Name’s Faith, baby, but I understand the mix-up,” Faith quipped.

                “Fuck – you,” said Buffy slowly, breathing deeply.

                “We already did that,” Faith pointed out. “It’s your turn now.” Her thumb moved inward on Buffy’s breast, pressing down the nipple firmly. Buffy felt as if she were sinking into the bed on each exhale and rising to Faith’s touch on each inhale, rocking with the steady tide of the sensations assaulting her body and mind. Faith sucked at Buffy’s tender neck and all of her muscles rippled in reply. While her thumb gently circled Buffy’s areola, Faith’s lips began to move slowly down and away from the macabre erogenous zone.

                “Ahhh please.” Buffy’s hips squirmed in anticipation as Faith’s mouth reached the top of her right breast. Taking the hint, Faith’s hand dropped to Buffy’s stomach, moving in deliberately slow motions and teasing the idea of what was to come. “Please,” Buffy repeated in a desperate whisper as the most extreme heights of pleasure remained tantalizingly out of reach. Faith’s tongue teased the flesh just beyond the border of Buffy’s areola, causing her to sigh in frustration. “Need you,” said Buffy, trying to make it sound like a command.

                Fingers teased across the waistband of Buffy’s panties and the Slayer arched against the touch. The bud of her nipple was pressed down by Faith’s tongue, sending tingles of pleasure throughout her body. Faith blew softly on the moistened nipple and Buffy shuddered. Steadying the stiffened bud between her teeth, Faith teased it with gentle flicks of her tongue. Buffy felt as if every cell of her body were charged with an electrical current, beginning where her body met Faith’s. Faith suckled her nipple and Buffy ached for the physical intimacy that was being provided.

                “Yessss,” Buffy encouraged as Faith’s fingers slipped beneath the waistband of her underwear. She felt a gentle tugging sensation as Faith’s palm pressed against her pubic hair while her fingers teased Buffy’s folds. Gently spreading her with the index and ring fingers, Faith slipped her middle finger into Buffy’s opening. “God!” Buffy groaned pleasurably, feeling Faith’s finger inside as well as a soft pressure against the hood of her clit.

                “You like that?” Faith asked, pausing to stroke Buffy’s nipple with her tongue. “You gonna come for me, Buffy?”

                “Fuck yes,” Buffy sighed.

                “Bet you wish I’d take those panties off, huh?” Faith questioned as she withdrew her finger.

                “Uhhh, don’t care,” Buffy moaned. “Just do me already.”

                “Well, that hardly seems fair,” Faith noted. “Me being all naked, I think I need to see the rest of your gorgeous body.”

                “Then take them off,” Buffy instructed. Faith pulled her hand out and gripped the front of the waistband. “Come on,” Buffy pleaded, lifting her hips obligingly.

                “You must want me real bad by now,” Faith mused, hand still resting in place.

                “So hot,” Buffy whimpered.

                “Well,” Faith sat up, grasping the panties with both hands now, “if you’re hot, we should probably remove some layers.”

                “Do it,” Buffy hissed.

                “You’re sure?” Faith verified.

                Buffy responded with an incoherent growl. Deciding not test her luck any further, Faith slowly eased the simple garment down Buffy’s legs.

                “Is that better?” Faith asked, hands caressing Buffy’s legs now.

                “Wanna feel you,” Buffy whined.

                “Feel me, huh?” Faith’s hands moved up Buffy’s thighs, thumbs massaging the supple flesh as they moved. “Want me inside you?” Her thumbs traced the edges between Buffy’s thighs and her pubic mound. “Want me to touch your clit?” One hand rested at the top of Buffy’s thigh while the other gently trailed through her pubic hair. “Want me to lick you?”

                “Only if you want to,” Buffy mumbled with a blush. She assumed that oral sex would be within the imprint’s parameters, but she didn’t want to overstep any boundaries.

                “I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t want to, blondie,” Faith informed her as she leaned in and started kissing her thigh. “And natural too. Good on you, by the way,” she added, working her way up and inward. Her index finger circled Buffy’s labia as Faith moved ever-closer to her destination.

                “Oh fuck, so good, so good,” Buffy chanted under her breath as Faith’s index finger just barely slipped inside, flirting with the idea of penetration. Lips and nose brushing against soft blonde hair, Faith was nearly there now. In unison, her finger pushed in deeply while her tongue flitted over Buffy’s clit and the Slayer arched briefly. “Just like that,” Buffy sighed happily. Faith’s licks were soft and brief, but delivered perfectly measured doses of pleasure that made Buffy tremble and quake.

                “Oh, Faith. Ohhh, Faith!” she moaned loudly as Faith added a second finger inside of her. Both fingers pumped in a firm, steady rhythm and Buffy’s inner muscles clenched briefly with each thrust. She inhaled sharply as Faith sucked her clit and her legs began to shake. “God, yes, suck my clit!” Buffy commanded. “More! More!” Her head tossed from side to side in pleasure. Faith’s tongue pressed against Buffy’s clit, providing a pleasant counter-pressure to the suction. “Come on, come on, come on,” Buffy whimpered, hips bucking slightly. Faith switched back to a single finger, occasionally curling it and prodding various areas.

                “No good,” Buffy dismissed. “Stick to the clit.” Faith lapped eagerly at Buffy’s straining clit, continuing to idly thrust with her finger. Buffy’s hips bucked and her clit brushed briefly against Faith’s teeth, prompting Faith to place her free hand on Buffy’s stomach to hold her steady. “So close,” Buffy announced, continuing to writhe beneath Faith’s firm hand.

                Faith sucked Buffy’s clit again, finally pushing her over the edge as she came with a cry of, “Dear GOD!” Her back arched as her muscles rippled rhythmically from head to toe like waves washing over her. She could feel tension slipping away and contentment flooding her system with the ebb and flow of those waves. Suddenly she found herself hyperaware of the tactile pressures on her body. Faith’s fingers splayed across her stomach and another wrapped tightly within a ring of contracting vaginal muscles, the sheets against her back absorbing perspiration, the firm edge of the bed pressing against her palm and a pliant pillow clutched in her other hand. Gasping for air, she allowed her body to sink deeply into the mattress as the intense waves of pleasure faded.

                “Ahhh, God,” she sighed, stretching her arms and legs as Faith pulled away and crawled up next to her.

                “Good?” Faith questioned.

                “Good doesn’t even _begin_ to cover it,” said Buffy happily. “This was definitely worth it.”

                “Worth what?” asked Faith curiously

                “Oh – just – you know, the risk, the effort – all that stuff,” Buffy mumbled evasively.

                “Yeah, it really was, wasn’t it?” Faith pondered. “Part of me feels like it’s always been you, you know?”

                “Oh, don’t go all mushy on me,” Buffy insisted.

                “I mean it, though,” said Faith, “we’ve got a good thing here. I’m glad we could – you know, get over ourselves and figure that out.”

                “Yeah,” Buffy sighed despondently, thoughts of the real Faith intruding upon her afterglow.

                “You all right?” asked Faith, picking up on the change in Buffy’s mood.

                “Yeah, just – thinking about all the lost time,” she lied.

                “Well, we’ll make up for it,” Faith assured her.

                “You bet,” said Buffy distantly. She pulled herself closer, laying her head across the doll’s chest. “Has anyone ever told you your breasts are exceptional?” Buffy mused.

                “Pretty much everyone,” said the doppelganger as she wrapped an arm around Buffy’s shoulders, “but it’s nice to hear you say it.”

                “This is really nice,” Buffy reflected. “I almost wish I could stay in this night forever.”

                “We’ll have more,” said the doll, beginning to stroke Buffy’s hair now.

                “Yeah.”

                “I love you.”

                “I love you, Faith,” Buffy whispered, shutting her eyes against the tears forming there.

                Eventually they fell asleep like that, lulled by each other’s rhythmic breathing. Neither of them noticed Buffy’s cell phone, vibrating among the pile of discarded clothing. So neither of them heard the message Willow left on Buffy’s voicemail.

                “_Buffy, it’s me. I think something’s wrong. Well, maybe not wrong, but definitely not right. I started feeling these ripples – magic ripples, that is. It seems like maybe something’s up with the spell I used to put Faith’s memories in that wedge. I checked in the nether realms and I think it’s something to do with that girl, like she’s resisting the imprint or something. I was looking at Rossum’s files on her and there’s definitely some interesting stuff in her blood work. It’s almost like she made the magic turn corrosive or something. I’m still trying to figure out exactly what’s happening, but I thought you should know just in case she starts acting weird or something. Call me as soon as you get this._”


	5. Faithful Echo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Echo tries to sort things out.

**Fandom**: BtVS/Dollhouse**  
Title**: Echoes of Faith  
**Chapter 5**: Faithful Echo  
**Characters/Pairing**: Buffy/“Faith”, Echo  
**Rating**: PG-13  
**Warnings**: Mild angst. Incidental nudity.  
**Summary**: Echo tries to sort things out.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Sierra:** I try to be my best.

**Echo:** Are you?

**Sierra:** Excuse me?

**Echo:** Are you your best?

**Sierra:** I’m not sure how to know that.

**Echo:** I think, if you always try, that’s best.

_-from Dollhouse S01E04: Gray Hour-_

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

                Echo blinked slowly as she awoke. The first thing she noticed was that this definitely wasn’t her pod. This was a large and especially squishy bed that made her feel almost like she was sinking. It seemed like most of the people Echo visited had beds like this; Echo thought she probably preferred the pods. The room was very dark and someone nearby was breathing strangely. Sierra used to make those type of breathing sounds when she cried. A soft, white light filled the room through the glass in the walls and Echo’s eyes began to adjust as she blinked a few more times.

                The strange, shallow breaths continued and Echo tried to remember what they were called. She thought they might be called sods, but she also thought that was probably wrong. Then she remembered that sods was what Martin had called his friends. Paul liked to ask questions about Martin. The blonde girl had asked about Paul. The blonde girl was sobbing. Sobs! That was it.

                Echo sat up to get a better view of the room. It became apparent that the blonde girl had turned on a lamp as Echo noticed the dim yellow light that covered part of the room. The blonde girl was sitting at the edge of the bed with her back to Echo. She had a very pretty back. Realizing that they were both naked, Echo suddenly started to remember some of the things that they had done together. Topher had made her gray again. No, that wasn’t right; she was having trouble with words today. Gay. Topher had made her gay. Topher made lots of people gay.

                She watched the blonde girl and tried to remember her name. And then she tried to remember her own name; who had they made her this time? Sometimes it made her head hurt when she tried to remember things. Faith. Why had Faith gone away? Usually that only happened in the chair. Echo thought she would probably need to get Faith back before her next treatment. Where was she hiding? There was something different about this imprint.

                The blonde girl continued to quietly sob and no matter how hard she tried to remember her name, all Echo could come up with was the letter “B”. That couldn’t be right, could it? Echo felt sad for B; people didn’t usually sob after her engagements.

                “Are you sad?” Echo asked her.

                B’s shoulders jumped and she turned around to face Echo with curiosity in her tearstained face. She looked confused. Echo thought maybe it was because of her voice; Faith had spoken differently.

                “Faith, I’m sorry,” B mumbled, wiping her eyes with her hands, “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

                “I don’t mind,” Echo assured her.

                “Are you – feeling okay,” asked B, looking a little bit confused again.

                Echo was unsure of what to do. B would probably realize that she wasn’t Faith sooner or later. Should she go ahead and tell her? Would she get in trouble for not being Faith?

                “I’m fine,” Echo began hesitantly, “but I’m not Faith anymore.”

                “Oh!” B’s eyebrows went really high on her forehead. “I didn’t – does that – is that normal?”

                Echo tilted her head thoughtfully.

                “I don’t understand,” she replied.

                “I mean, do you usually change back?” B prompted. “Am I supposed to – call your handler or something?”

                “Please don’t,” Echo requested. “They won’t like it if I’m not Faith.”

                “Okay, so it’s not normal then,” B reasoned. “But maybe they can help you.”

                “They don’t want to help me,” said Echo sadly. “I can get Faith back,” she insisted, “just give me a little time. You wouldn’t like Adelle when she’s angry.”

                “Good point,” B agreed, “I wouldn’t want her to think it’s my fault.” Her eyes got big again. “It’s not my fault, is it?”

                “I don’t think so,” Echo responded thoughtfully.

                “Okay. Good,” said B. “I guess I’ll just – let you do your thing then.”

                “She’ll come out when she’s ready,” said Echo, “I’d like to talk to you, B.”

                “Oh, not you too,” B sounded unhappy.

                “I’m sorry,” said Echo quickly, “B is all I can remember.”

                “I’m not surprised,” answered the blonde with a roll of her eyes. “She – uh – Faith likes to call me ‘B’ a lot. My name’s actually Buffy.”

                “Oh,” said Echo shortly. “But if you don’t like it then why did you ask them to make me like that?”

                “Well – Faith is someone I know,” Buffy explained, “and I needed you to be her.”

                “Is she dead?” asked Echo somewhat bluntly, thinking of how Joel had liked to visit with Rebecca. If Faith were dead, that might also explain the crying.

                “No, she’s not,” Buffy answered. “Do you guys get that a lot or something?”

                “Just Rebecca and Margaret, I think,” said Echo, “is that a lot?”

                “Eh,” said Buffy with a shrug, “I see more dead people than that in a week, most of the time.”

                “You do?” Echo questioned in curiosity.

                “Long story,” Buffy told her.

                “But Faith’s not dead?” Echo verified.

                “Right.”

                “Then why did you need me to be her?” asked Echo, always eager to learn.

                “I…” Buffy opened and shut her mouth a few times. “Because Faith – doesn’t feel the same way about me that I feel about her.”

                “Is that why you’re sad?”

                “Yeah,” said Buffy softly. “Yeah, that’s why I’m sad.”

                “People are usually happier after they’ve been with me,” Echo reflected.

                “It’s not your fault,” said Buffy kindly. “I mean, what we did was – nice.”

                “It was nice for me too,” Echo assured her. “You’re very good at sex.” It had been very enjoyable and Echo knew that clients liked to hear this. She hoped it would cheer Buffy up some.

                “Uh – thanks,” said Buffy as her cheeks turned a light pink color.

                Echo watched her expectantly for a moment.

                “Doesn’t that make you happy?” she asked.

                “Oh, yeah,” said Buffy quickly, “I mean, I’m glad I was good at it.”

                “I like to make people happy,” stated Echo.

                “Picking up on that,” said Buffy.

                “You don’t seem very happy,” Echo observed. “Is there anything I can do?”

                “It’s not your job to make me happy,” Buffy told her kindly.

                “Isn’t it?”

                “I – okay, got me there,” Buffy admitted. “You did everything you were supposed to do.”

                “But you’re still not happy.”

                “And that’s not your fault, okay?” said Buffy with a sigh. “I’m sad because Faith doesn’t…” she swallowed slowly and her eyes got teary again.

                “Because Faith doesn’t want to have sex with you?” Echo guessed.

                “Not that,” said Buffy. “Well, not _just_ that,” she corrected. “I – really care about Faith. And being with you helped me realize that I’m in love with her. And she doesn’t love me. That’s why I’m sad. Do you know what it’s like to love someone who doesn’t love you back?”

                “I don’t think so,” said Echo thoughtfully. Some of Echo’s imprints had been in love, but they were always loved back.

                “Well, it’s not fun,” said Buffy sadly.

                “How do you know Faith doesn’t love you?” Echo questioned.

                “I…” Buffy thought for a moment. “No one really _knows_ that,” she reasoned, “but I’ve spent a lot of time with her and I don’t think she feels the same way.”

                “I think she does,” said Echo simply. “When I was her, I loved you.”

                “That’s because I asked them to make you that way.”

                “I don’t think they had to do very much,” Echo countered. “I can see the gaps when things aren’t filled in. I think Faith really has those feelings inside of her.”

                “No,” said Buffy firmly. “Don’t do this. Don’t – give me false hope.”

                “False hope?” asked Echo blankly.

                “I can’t keep hoping for things that aren’t going to happen,” Buffy insisted. “This whole thing was supposed to be about putting Faith behind me.”

                “But why would you do that if she can make you happy?” Echo didn’t understand why Buffy was so determined to be sad.

                “She doesn’t love me!” Buffy snapped. “You think you know because you had my – my twisted fantasy version of her in your head, but you don’t.”

                “Maybe I don’t,” Echo admitted, “but you said that you don’t either. Why wouldn’t you want to know for sure?”

                “If I thought she was interested, I wouldn’t have even come here.”

                “But what does _she_ think?” said Echo plainly. “The only way to find out is to ask her.”

                “I can’t,” Buffy denied flatly.

                “Why not?”

                “I can’t risk everything we – things are always so – it would only make things worse,” she finished sadly.

                “I don’t understand,” said Echo. “What could be worse than thinking she doesn’t love you?”

                “Knowing it,” Buffy whispered.

                “I think knowing is better than not knowing,” said Echo sagely. “Not knowing is making you feel worse.”

                “I just want to move on,” Buffy sighed. “There’s no need to rock the boat.”

                “She has a boat?”

                “Metaphor,” Buffy explained. “Sorry, I guess that was a bit over your head. It just means I don’t want to make things difficult between us. If she doesn’t love me back then we wouldn’t be able to be friends either. And I really want to keep her as a friend, even if there can’t be anything else between us.”

                “Why wouldn’t you be able to be friends?” Echo questioned, still unclear on what Buffy was afraid of.

                “Because – love makes things really complicated,” said Buffy. “Once love becomes part of the equation, people can’t be just friends anymore.”

                “But why?”

                “That’s just how it works,” said Buffy gently. “Love and friendship just don’t mesh.”

                “I think they do mesh,” Echo argued. “If ‘mesh’ means what I think it means. Friendship is a kind of love, isn’t it? I think if Faith is really your friend then you can still have friend-love even if she doesn’t want sex-love.”

                “It sounds nice, but it doesn’t really work like that.”

                “But it should,” Echo protested. “It doesn’t make sense that people spend so much time stopping themselves from being happy. Don’t you think you would be happier if Faith knew how you feel?”

                “I…” Buffy looked confused again.

                “It seems like you just want to be sad,” Echo observed.

                “It’s not like that,” Buffy assured her. “It’s just – really scary when you don’t know.”

                “Isn’t that why you should talk to her?” Echo pointed out. “I don’t think things will be as bad as you think they will. When you’re afraid, things usually seem worse than they really are.”

                “Maybe that’s true,” said Buffy, “but I have good reasons for my fear. Faith and I have a lot of history.”

                “I know.”

                “You do?”

                “Yes,” said Echo thoughtfully as she felt Faith stirring in the back of her thoughts.

                “You okay?” asked Buffy.

                “She’s coming back.”

                “Faith?” Buffy questioned.

                “I can feel her.” Echo paused in thought. “Oh, B,” she reflected sadly as she began seeing flashes of Buffy’s life through Faith’s eyes. “So lonely. _Everybody’s looking to me, trusting me to lead them, and I’ve never felt so alone in my entire life. And that’s you every day, isn’t it?_”

                “Faith,” said Buffy again.

                “You should let yourself be happy, Buffy,” Echo persisted, holding up a hand to Buffy’s cheek. “I wish I could have helped you.”

                “I…” Buffy swallowed again, fighting another onslaught of tears.

                “You don’t have to be afraid,” said Echo reassuringly. “Even if she doesn’t love you, I know she doesn’t want to hurt you anymore. _Just tell me how to make it better._ She’s so sorry.”

                Echo felt her own thoughts fading into the background as she made room for Faith.

                “Hey, B,” she said slowly. “What’s the matter?” she asked with concern, seeing the tears welling in Buffy’s eyes.

                “I…” Buffy blinked once and the tears spilled over, racing each other down her cheeks. “I think it’s time for your treatment.”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

                Buffy sat again at the foot of the bed; she was fully clothed now and still fighting a steady stream of tears. The doll had lost nearly all sense of focus at the mention of a treatment. She had dressed quickly, pausing to complain about the ripped underwear. Only once had she stopped, apparently unsettled by the gloom in Buffy’s face, and she had assurances that she would return right after her treatment. Buffy had dressed as well and escorted the doll to a black van, parked only a block away from the hotel. It was afterwards that Buffy had returned to her room and lost control of the tears. Now she was alone and there was no post-coital “Faith”, no sleeping “Faith”, no dressing “Faith”, and no doll from which to hide the full extent of her emotions.

                It was the confusion, most of all that made Buffy cry so hard. There was no real way to know if the doll had been right or if the “Faith” imprint had simply been very well-grafted into Faith’s persona. Buffy repeatedly told herself that if there was any chance that Faith would truly return her feelings, it would be worth the risks. A part of her didn’t want things to be awkward between her and Faith; another part of her was afraid that Faith, instead of being awkward, would find the whole thing amusing. Buffy hated the uncertainty; the constant doubts and fears were debilitating in ways she was not accustomed to. More than anything, she just wished her thoughts would stop.

                There was only one thing to be done.

                She pulled her cell phone from her pocket and flipped it open. Ignoring the two missed calls, she began to dial. Waiting through several rings, Buffy began drying her eyes on her sleeve.

                “Yes, hello,” Buffy greeted thankfully when someone finally answered. “I was hoping to book a flight. How soon can you get me to Cleveland?”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

**:::END:::**


End file.
